Video 24 –
Trouble Finding Awareness

In this segment...

When it’s hard to find the ‘I’ — noticing the one who’s looking.

What is Awareness? Awareness is simply the capacity to experience. If we are expecting a dramatic “bells and whistles” kind of experience, we may think we are missing it. It’s not dramatic, yet it is extra-ordinary.

The awareness, the capacity to notice, is like a mirror which can reflect anything, “positive” or “negative” and neither damages the mirror. The mirror remains the same no matter what experiences might have been reflected in it.

Also discussed: Integrating the ‘me’, integrating personas.

Additional Thoughts: (Not in this training segment, but related.)

The capacity to notice is actually full presence. It’s not an empty, “lacking” kind of neutralness. It doesn’t exclude any aspect of our aliveness. When all the small contracted ‘I’s have been released and relaxed as awareness, and when anything we have held as separate from ourself is also included, we experience ourselves as a full presence.

There are so many ways we learn to hold things as separate from ourselves, and each one reduces our own aliveness. If we are holding an idea in our mind of what awareness “should be like," we are likely to be disappointed. It’s not any idea - it is just presence itself. When this happens we need to notice our expectation and include the ‘I’ who expects something. We notice where it is located and invite it to also dissolve/melt.



  • hagai sofer

    March 6, 2014

    is there a way a way to dissolve expectaions?

  • Mike Brown

    May 21, 2014

    Hi Connirae. Would you recommend experimenting with other pronouns? …. ie You. we, us , them etc

    • Connirae

      May 23, 2014

      Mike, yes, it can be interesting to experiment with other pronouns. However, I think it works best to begin with the ‘i’, and really work with that.
      Then at a later time it can even be interesting to take a sentence and explore what happens when the way we hold each word in the sentence is allowed to dissolve. Every word marks a certain internal structure. The pronouns tend to be more interesting words because they involve generalizations that are broader. But I recommend that as people begin with this method, really explore the ‘i’, or “the one perceiving”. That one’s the most useful for starters. From there I usually bring in the authority which is coming up soon on Video 27. (The authority is a special case of “he/she/they” or of “you”), and is a very powerful thing to notice and work with.

The Wholeness Process / Unit F / Video 24 – Trouble Finding Awareness